Making a Berkeley of Cambridge

OK, small triumph. In Berkeley California it happens often enough that you've seen someone (of either sex) naked before you meet them. It would happen through parties, ceremonies, hot tubs or any other kind of outlet. I like that. Its personal.

I haven't really found the Boston area as likely for that, and you can't blame the weather. That said, it's probably my provincial Cambridge circle, which is expanding. I've heard tell of a few hottub mailing lists, and some friends saw a guy at a laundromat that they 'met' at a sex party.

NOW, I'm happy to say I'm finally pulling my own weight as far as bridging the ethics. In the past week I've made THREE friends who saw me (mostly) naked before meeting me, and who aren't afraid of me for it.

I say that's a pretty good start, even if I was the only one without clothes on at both parties (besides Romie, but he hasn't made any friends from it yet).

Inside Joke Fest 2007

I made it to a top secret gathering in a beautiful little park up around Somerville. Its been in the works for a year apparently, a gathering arranged by the author of web comic XKCD. The park was full all day with the geekiest of geeks, from junior high age through college. Tough to be precise on the distribution, as enough MIT kids look 16 and pump pimply angst. That said people were good: excited, positive, active and curious.

What struck me was that, at its height (2:38), one in three people had a camera. The mindset of someone holding a camera is 'observer' and I suspect that was the mindset of most folks who didn't have one either; and this has consequences. People are in a mindframe of waiting for something to happen, but the event was about you being the thing that happens. It sunk in soon enough, all that happened at 2:38 was cheering and happy milling about. Very well documented milling.

Folks, don't forget that an event like this is as amazing as you decide it will be. It was pretty amazing today; the park signs were genius, the red spiders, the mass of the tower and the fan finished comic. But mostly milling, all the boys waiting for a dream girl to hop on their lap. You can do better. And I'll do my part, promise.

Auto debate: 1957 Chevy vs. 2007 Chevy Impala

This was originally posted here.

Was the '57 Chevy the last car that could honorably wear the royal oil-stained cloth? Is a 2007 Impala an upstart unlike any that has been seen in vehicular manufacturing? Let the evidence be the judge, because that's how real grease monkeys enact the law.

The '57 Chevy is still around--in Cuba. There it is used to ford the intimidating straits between the Bay of Pigs and the Florida Keys. Any Cuban shoe shine can find a way to turn scaffolding for a Castro bust into an alternator, and the sheer girth of the '57 is not taken lightly by any citizen so foolish as to ride a bike near its haunches.

2007 Impala is fast and can distance itself from cheetahs, using a tracking system OnStar will never be able to simulate. It is herbivorous and thus has low fuel costs, though the byproduct of its consumption can be problematic for roadway cleanliness.

The '57 Chevy can be carved out and made into a xeriscape garden or a trans-Atlantic flotation device. It can be painted in red, green, blue or panchromatic.

The 2007 Impala is often hunted by bipeds or quadrupeds, and when eaten its flesh tastes divine (some compare it to "chicken"). Its coast is soft and luxurious, and when poached at a young enough age it retains its sheen.

So in the end I take the '57 for functionality and the 2007 for aesthetics. Any thoughts?

Whoremones

For the life of me I cannot determine why all college students look older than I do, though in fact I'm at least a year older than the average collegiate senior. They're taller, hairier, brawnier, and cursed/blessed with more skin creases (that then develop into wrinkles later in life). I've since determined that since I was a young laddy, I've generally eaten low quantities of meats, dairy products, and, to some degree eggs. These foodstuffs have consequently the highest steroid content, and as such would activate all the glands and growth patterns consistent with hormone replacement in post-menopausal women and frequenters of BALCO. Now it's possible I just don't look my age based on a number of other factors, including my lack of professional dress, but I feel comfortable with the notion that all these fraternity boys are bound to early graves due to their fondness of Micky D's.

Local produce finder

I made an app on Pipes that finds local produce. It's not perfect, but it will help you get started. Enjoy!

http://pipes.yahoo.com/pipes/pipe.info?_id=qNsdQPVU3BG0YO3jBx2yXQ



NVRmind that though. heres a really good one:

http://www.foodroutes.org/localfood/index.jsp

Primitive or working on a grand plan?

I've been reading a lot about Dasypodidae recently mostly because I'm lonely and too fond of mescal. Armadillos, as they're known in lay circles, are far too primitive for their own good. It has been presumed that these placental mammals weren't able to escape the time warp of evolution, and have been forced to live a most pathetic existence as constant fodder for the wheeled demons of American roadways. In the South, if you do not see an armadillo obliterated during your commute, smashed such that even the most skilled forensic mammalogist wouldn't be able to identify the hide nor hair, well then you've been drinking too much moonshine.

But not one of the 20 species in the family is endangered, or even sensitive in the case of North America. They flock to asphalt as if it's 'dillo-nip, are subsequently annhilated, and yet they still keep procreating without hindrance.

There is clearly something in the water, as there always is in the South. I suspect that there's something afoot with these half-blind, short-legged, reptillian-looking monstrosities, and it can only be explained by illegal immigration.

Yes, it is true, the Mexicans are bringing in armadillos because they know that these beasties will destroy the suspension units of AMERICAN-made cars. Has a Toyota, Honda, or any other rice- or cabbage-burning foreign car had its alignment thrown out by a disembowled armadillo? See for yourself. This is exactly what the most esteemed scientists in the field are studying, and so far the results are not pretty. Fords, Chevys, and GMC's are being taken for a ride by the wetbacks, and this time it's not through the use of clever tactics like lacing Taco Bell products with highly addictive marijuana or encouraging our children to take siestas during the school day so that their their ninos learn differential equations, C++, and Tolstoy whilst everyone else is fast asleep on their mat, which, by the way, is probably the perfect vector for Mexican typhus.

I'm on to the beaners, and I hope that all of you erudite readers will assist me in hunting down every single Mexican in the swamps and mangroves of the former Confederate States of America. God bless.

Lifetime warranty

I have a pair of nice headphones, worth 70 bucks or so, that I got brand new for 6. How? I found a broken pair in the junk bin of a garage sale, sent them in with the cost of postage and got a brand new pair a few weeks later.

So, browse the Google results for "lifetime warranty" and commit to memory whatever brands strike your fancy. You can let serendipity do the rest.

Mr. Clean: Sex Symbol or Hag Fag?

Thanks Wikipedia

So it could be that Mr. Clean is one of the few and early examples of using sex to sell commercial products to women? I figure that its either that or her is the 'trusted gay advisor'.

The earing is on the left and has been since the beginning, but how are 50's ad execs supposed to know conventions like that?

Either way, he's on territory that not many other folks have ventured. How else are men used to sell to women?

DIY QTip

My ears were all clogged up with wax, to the point of itchiness. My pinky is too big, so I tried to steal a q-tip from my roommates without their noticing, but they didn't have any. Ear candles are a little overboard, so I tried a toothpick but that is scary, poking around in your ear with a toothpick.

How can I make it less scary? I took the toothpick, dug around for a cotton ball, and rolled the toothpick against the fluff of the cotton. It turns that that this was nothing less than reinventing the qtip, the exact qtip!

It worked? Of course it worked, that is what a qtip is, they are so inconscpicuous, and so complete; they are so There, that I never thought of them as something that can be *made*. Not so mystical. No patented qtip technology. Why did I never know that? How did that knowledge get lost to humanity? Well, I guess that with both ends cushioned, noone heard this presumably timeless knowledge drop and slip through the cracks of time.

Making them gives you a steady hand and an intuition for fluff, you are basically spinning thread, but only a few inches of particularly fluffy thread. And I broke off the sharpest bit o' tip from the carefully machined splinter that served me, (otherwise its still just a tiny bit scary).

In Your Ear!

Splashback

If you are having problems with splashback, try dropping a square or two of TP in the bowl. You can see it as increasing the surface tension of the water. Help if you squat instead of sit, but thats a different post.

Two thumbtacks and a piece of string
little words have meaning.
Bead them on a length of line, say them like they're food;
A link, a bean, meaning, steam,
two thumbtacks and a piece of string

my favorite things

Here are eight of my favorite things in life:

-being in any part responsible for someone getting genuinely excited about something
-mutually unbearable sexual tension
-the clever use of language
-building something that works
-people smiling unselfconsciously, only to themselves (especially pretty girls)
-being with soft naked bellies
-the people who feel comfortable touching me without asking
-slowing down enough to let trivial things become magical

Know it all

As of Monday I'll have given four talks in two weeks, and each on a topic totally unrelated to the last. I spoke to friends for 10 minutes on simple properties of numbers that result from the base system used to represent them, than I spoke to a class of first graders on what Dr. Seuss was like as a person. A few days later I gave a talk to artists on why Dirt is Fascinating and on Monday I'll be talking to a few of my peers with physics backgrounds on what they need to know about graphic design and visual communication.

Do I love the sound of my own voice? Do I love acting like I know? Or is it how I usually tell myself, that I love to share things and to facilitate people in being excited about this world? How about all of the above.

I'm Easy, you're Easy (Animateur)

Hello Folks, for the second installment of the Animateur lecture
series, we will give the floor to an expert on "Easy Rider", the 1969
counterculture prerequisite, starring Peter Fonda, Dennis Hopper and
with a good bit of poor poor Jack Nicholson. After the talk, we will
watch the movie in giant screen.

Our guest is Drew Hannon, American Studies hotshot. Drew sat on the
"Motorcycle Life and Culture" panel at a recent American Studies
Conference and will be starting at Yale this Fall.

Expect Awesomeness. Bring a Friend.

When?
Friday, March 23th, the second to last Friday of the month starting at 7:00.

Where?
The Shangri-Loft
129 Franklin St. Apt 213
Cambridge, MA 02139
right behind the Middle East on Central Sq.
857 928 1699


We will start with a few talks, perhaps:
Do It Yourself Tampons
Why GMO Designer Pets is not an Evil Idea.
David Bowie
or even
Leveraging Human Flaws for Fun and Profit.
and then at 8, the main act, talk and movie.

If you want to give a five minute talk on something fascinating,
anything, write me a note and you're in.

WIth love,
-seth

Miss Information

One factor that determines our level of alertness from moment to moment is the number of safe assumptions that we can make about our environment. The more secure and stable your environment, the less you need to attend to it. The more unpredictable your environment, the more alert you have to be. There is no right or wrong level of alertness. In fact, you can change the level of uncertainty in your environment to match the level of alertness you would like to maintain. The Lil' Miss Information Clock provides a time that is incorrect, but within 10 minutes (by default) of being correct. It is sometimes fast and sometimes slow, so you'll just have to rely on yourself.

#!/usr/local/ruby

#Lil' Miss Information Clock
#because whoever missed just a *lil'* information?
#Seth Frey 
#enfascination.blogspot.com
#2007/03/02

$Offseth = 10                           #time is wrong by up to +/-
$Offseth seconds

while true
 time = Time.now
 mins = (time.min + (rand * 2 * $Offseth).round -
$Offseth).modulo(60)    #make minutes plus or minus actual time within Offseth
                        #modulo 60 accounts for roll over to next minute
 hours = time.hour
 if time.min - mins > 60 - $Offseth   #this if and elsif account for minutes rolling over (or back)
   hours = hours + 1
 elsif mins - time.min > 60 - $Offseth
   hours = hours - 1
 end
 hours = hours % 12                    #no military time
 hours = 12 if hours == 0              #side effect of eliminating
military time with mod
 puts hours.to_s + ":" + (mins < 10 ? '0' : '') + mins.to_s
# the if statement is for single digit minutes.  4:02 instead of 4:2
 Kernel.sleep(50)                      #wait just less than a minute before refreshing (one less safe assumption)
end

Memory Suck (Dream Worlds Project)

Last night I got closer to success than ever before with my efforts to record my dreams. The first computer programmed phone call came at 3:30, and I accidentally hung up on it (damn subconscious), but it primed me for the second at 5:30 this morning.

I was dreaming, my phone started to ring, I remember experiencing all memory of the dream getting washed away by the ring of the phone. My ringer (the NES Zelda ending theme) erased my memories. All I had left to tell my computer's recorder was that mere seconds ago I had been insulting someone, somewhere for some reason.

But (bright side??), my glitches aren't all attributable to human factors, it turns out that my recorder catches the phone ringing, and my answering machine message, but it can't pick up my voice when I speak. I might have accidentally switched sound drivers, or Skype might be playing tricks. The dream world project continues to be bogged down by reality, but it will manifest!

Your Partner

No one has sat down and explained it to me, so I can be forgiven for not really getting why some couples speak of their 'partner' instead of 'boyfriend', 'girlfriend', 'etc.' Maybe it sounds more progressive, or mature, or affected. I don't know.

What is harder to forgive is the hostility that I can never suppress when I hear it. So, New Rule: You can only be partners if you fight crime. That will also make you progressive.

Enfascinated: Cooperative Birth Control

Dear Jodi shared with us this recent Sunday her experiences with a new form a birth control. She and her boy Jay are on their fourth month of the experience. The method involves charting many physical, personal and other traits over the course of the month. There are three main things that ones tracks when practicing condom free, hormone free birth control.

First: monitor vaginal fluids. viscous and slippery means less fertile, tacky and gooey means more fertile

Second: take your temperature (in your mouth). Lower body temperature means less fertile. Temperature rises by about .6 degrees during and after ovulation. Since ovulation lasts for no more than three days, it is safe to have sex after three days of a .6 degree rise in basal temperature.

Third: Classic cycle watching. The days two weeks before the period are the danger danger zone. Using a calender or something more reliable than memory, find out exactly how long your cycle is (any where from 20 to 40 days) and pinpoint (plus or minus a week) when you are ovulating.

This method is outlined in the book A Cooperative Method of Natural Birth Control. (http://www.amazon.com/Cooperative-Method-Natural-Birth-Control/dp/0913990841) The argument is that any one method isn't completely reliable, but the three together, along with the awareness that comes with carefully monitoring any natural process, can reliably insure recreational sex. Go Sex!!

Sidenote: During the talk, it came out that we want to know more about human relationships with the moon. Any self proclaimed expert is invited to provide a paragraph on why this is a fascinating subject.

Enfascinated: Bucky Fuller

CJ Fearnley from Upper Darby, PA has offered these resources to help me understand why Buckminster Fuller is fascinating. :
"
So here is my blurb about Buckminster Fuller:

Synergetics is Fuller's magnum opus. It is on-line at http://www.rwgrayprojects.com/synergetics/synergetics.html

Here is the description of Synergetics that I maintain for the Synergetics Collaborative:
Synergetics is the system of wholistic thinking which R. Buckminster Fuller introduced and began to formulate. Synergetics is multi-faceted: it involves geometric modeling, exploring inter-relationships in the facts of experience and the process of thinking. Synergetics endeavors to identify and understand the methods that Nature actually employs in coordinating Universe (both physically and metaphysically). Synergetics provides a method and a philosophy for problem-solving and design and therefore has applications in all areas of human endeavor.

Synergetics is hard to read. So I wrote an essay
"Reading Synergetics: Some Tips" http://www.cjfearnley.com/synergetics.essay.html

CJ Fearnley
Executive Director
Synergetics Collaborative
http://synergeticists.org
"

Uhhh...human factors...(Dream World Project)

So with the hopes of gaining a more active relationship with my dream self I wrote a few scripts that call me at 3:30 and 5:30 in the morning every day and record everything I say. I did it with Skype's limited command line support, Total Recorder and some really simple scripting. When I say simple, I mean that it took me all day and if you don't know what bash is you won't be able to do this on your own using my method.

SO... it works, except it hasn't worked. I get two calls a night but I sleep through them both. So now I have a bunch of computer recordings of my voicemail message. But I'm a trooper and with luck my dream self will have an internet representation as well.

Here is the simple script (mangled from), called from a .bat which is called from Total Recorder's scheduling system:

c:/Program\ Files/Skype/Phone/Skype.exe &
sleep 10
c:/Program\ Files/Skype/Phone/Skype.exe /callto:001XXXXXXXXXX &
sleep 120
killall -m "Skype"
exit 0<

I also have windows scheduler open Total Recorder a few minutes before 3 and 5 thirty and close it a few minutes after, that helps.

Assass

So this video is not just a magic moment in itself, it was the culmination of three months of hunting and killing on my part, and hiding on Romie's part. An epic game of assassins. In the very beginning we promised not to kill each other if we were the last two alive. And when we were, we kept the promise, despite some close calls, and made a bargain to split the win. I got the glory, he got the prize. We staged a grand final showdown, that is ultimately for your viewing pleasure.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1LpdsBfKwT0
Notes: this was in 2003. Bitkower annotated the hefty bag. Romie saved his moustache just to look more evil for the film. No kittens were harmed, but I almost lost my face.

Jeremiah's Fascinations

Medium to extensive knowledge on:

hacking society
creation myths
patterning of humpback whalesong
indigenous textiles
middle America life
the constellations
animal emotions

drug adventures that change time

the chemistry of baking
good beer


Wants to know:
the rise and fall of String Theory
the science behind the structure of music, and how it affects human emotion
the development of the modern pencil
arguments in favor of cannibalism
how ants communicate chemically
Neanderthal society
self-castration for religious purposes
whether sexual orientation is decided by genetics
the development of SCUBA equipment
a brief history of execution by hanging

Everything is Enfascinated

Here are some things that I want to learn about. If you know any of these things I would love for less than a page and more than a paragraph on what it is that makes that subject so totally awesome.

More importantly, I would like your list too.


indigenous textiles
the joy of joy and power of misery
better living with simple machines
living with serendipity
health benefits of fruit
the hidden rules behind how to be cool
party dances of the fifties and their funny names
the history of any Idea
the forgotten implications of the nation-state
intro to hustling
fame
wealth and fame
how do trees grow and
what is so great about dirt
and the constellations
the chemistry of baking
ways of knowing very complicated systems
DIY anything/everything
similarly: I'm trapped on a desert island. How do I . . .
animal emotions
plant emotions
Internet culture
ornament
drug adventures that change time
Can you fix your eyesight with simple exercises?
what goes into a really good sauce?
and whats up with Miso soup?
dream worlds
vanity as a virtue
ADD as a necessary human adaptation to the information age
What can you say when very very smart people believe things about society that you don't want to be true (like Von Neumann's Mutually Assured Destruction)?
hacking society
monsters
type design (renaissance faces)
past visions of the future
changing visions of the past (and the history of history)
is there any point to meditating without entirely leaving society.
how to speed read
emergent properties
paper watermarks
creation myths
how to communicate neat ideas/change peoples minds/make people really care.
similarly, how do people work?
LED lighting as a replacement for tungsten
kids stories from the turn of the other century
is there any astrology deeper than generalizations?
looms
California Native history and California before it was called that
Japanese pop culture and rural culture
middle America culture
artificial life
what is natural?
similarly; the history of floral prints
linear systems
everyday chemistry
everyday physics
everyday geology
everyday math
everyday statistics
everyday linguistics
what idea from your field had a big influence on your everyday life?
Buckminster Fuller
the insults and cusses of the world's languages (There are 6000
languages in the world today. 3000 will be extinct in the next 50 years)
demography
untranslatable expressions from Japan
superfoods
Russian urban youth culture
rap in different langauges
emerging markets
the (rising?) role of comedy in politics
how can I stay awake in class (and why do I always fall asleep)
is nostalgia anything but a marketing tool?
Are there any other methods besides meditation for improving clarity
of thought?
What is the difference between exercise and strain?
is the free market the closest implementation of a decentralized
evolutionary system
in economics?
is there a tradeoff between memory and creativity?
whats wrong with 'technology will solve our woes'

Instructions to my next hairdresser

So I don't have much hair, and the situation will only get worse. My options are few: shaved head baldy(to the bone or 1/4 inch), combover baldy(denial), gradstudent baldy (greasy, fro-like and neglected). Not much to work with, the only real option is the first, and hats, but I've got an idea. On the top and back of my head I get these little cowlicks, and when they are short they have a mischevious six year-old vibe, when they are long they look like Caesar's laurels. In between, we'll call it the little Caesar, its kid-like. So take the tuft up front down to the bone(can't stand the tuft), and take the back, sides and most of the top to a quarter inch. But play up the laurels. Make them stand out enough that someone paying attention will notice, but subtle enough that no one else will, so it looks like it just grows that way.

These instructions aren't all that far out, but I don't think any (stylist? barber?) that doesn't know me would take me seriously. This vision can be made to work and it can be made to not work. I've done what I can do, outlining the goal, the rest is up to the cutter. This is what you've got to work with: www.myspace.com/enfascination. If you think you can make it happen, get back to me. With a shared vision for the future male pattern, little Caesar will conquer as surely as strands wash down the drain.